Thursday, April 19, 2012

Soul Ties

If you are in tune with your spirituality, you definitely know what Soul Ties are and how they can really stifle your growth in mind, body and spirit…For those that don’t know what Soul Ties are, pay close attention…

Whenever you have sex with someone, your soul ties to theirs (regardless if you are or aren’t attached emotionally). Some people’s Soul Ties are tighter than others…and for every person you’ve ever had sex with, and for every person your partner has had sex with and with their partners before, still connects Soul Ties. So if you’ve had sex with only 2 people before your current partner and your current partner has had sex with only you, you both are connected to those 2 other people and their partners…kind of scary, right?

Yes, STDs and pregnancy are very important, but so are Soul Ties…Soul Ties are just that…some people have stronger and more intense energy than others. Especially when you engage in unprotected sex…both of your life energy are exchanged between each other which make your Soul Tie closer, even if neither of you love each other…and this is also why people start having sucka attacks and get whipped when they really don’t care about the person…your Souls are Tied.

Have you ever had sex with someone and even long after you’ve stopped talking to them and haven’t seen them in months; they constantly stay on your mind? It’s that STRONG Soul Tie…its very hard to break. Even people have slept with someone years ago, then have a child with another person and their child acts like their past lover…that’s because their Soul Tie with the past lover is still connected to them.

People don’t understand why their demeanor or personality changes out of the blue (not associated with mental illnesses). Usually, it’s because the energy of a past love or loves is still connected to their soul…energy in general also makes a huge influence on Soul Ties. You shouldn’t let everyone in your energy field (personal space) either for this reason as well. Even if you don’t sleep with some people, their energy sticks to you because you’ve let your energy field down… I’m not saying that you shouldn’t let people near you, or touch you, but you SHOULD be very aware of WHO you let in your personal space… (

People usually break Soul Ties by praying and meditating. Asking for peace, healing, forgiveness (to your body for allowing negative energy in) and allowing positive energy in are key to helping to free yourself.

~YL, OS~

Tantric Sexuality, Part II

“See the ultimate pleasure is giving pleasure…patient lovers…if you should feel thirsty, I’ll be sure to bring you water… I know your favorite love song and how you like it on repeat. I was born a patient lover so I’ll start with your feet…when hearts one beat as one, it will feel like no ordinary kiss…you and I…close your eyes and picture us breathing life…” ~Breathe, Raheem DeVaughn~

These lyrics are a PERFECT example of Tantric Sex (TS)…all spirituality, energy and selflessness…

A lot of actually engaging in TS is also based in the Kama Sutra (KS) (the ancient Indian art of lovemaking). All of the positions in the KS are designed for both participants to open their bodies to free flowing energy or keep their bodies close to create more confined and intense energy. The Lotus is the position that was created to completely align the Chakras during lovemaking.

While engaging in face to face positions, try to use some of the techniques you learned from Part I. Mastering TS and the KS does take time and patience (who DOESN’T like sexercise?) As you experiment and become more comfortable and confident, you both will see that you can control the intensity of each others orgasm, have longer, passionate lovemaking sessions without becoming exhausted easily/quickly.

Take your time…research…discuss…journal…make mental notes…just have fun!

~YL, OS~

Tantric Sexuality, Part I

Tantric Sex, Part I

I’m freaky…I’ll admit it to mostly anyone who is comfortable enough with me to ask…Most people also feel that they’re freaky when in actuality, they aren’t. True “freakiness” starts with being uninhibited. Having an open MIND (not JUST an open body) is essential to being a freak, because when your MIND is free, your body will follow. Being in tune with your own body is also key to truly enjoying sex. How can you even begin to enjoy pleasure from your partner if you don’t know what you really like? (Marinate on that for a moment).  Being unselfish is also important to truly enjoying sex…if one person is selfless and the other is selfish, the mind starts to shut down, because your needs and wants aren’t being met.

Bad “lovers” are just that because they don’t think…they just do…think about it…and bad “lover” you’ve ever had was more than likely selfish, arrogant and insecure. They were doers not thinkers…which leads me to this…

Most people know from experience that the most MIND (there’s that word again) blowing, breathtaking, exhilarating and satisfying sex has always been with someone that you loved. Yes, we’ve all (hopefully) had at least partner that had us fiendin… not always have we been in love with them, but they had A1+++ sex game…think….its usually because they were thinking and intent on pleasing you and vice versa.  Some of the best lovemaking to be had is that which uses Tantric Sexuality.

Tantric Sexuality (TS) is basically the increase d spiritual awareness of the erotic consciousness that encompasses one’s human embodiment. Basically, TS is the practice of using energy to provide sexual pleasure. Actions that provide this are mainly breathing techniques, aligning and lining up the Chakras and using your eyes (think; window to the soul).

TS should not use any touch…its ALL energy (if you touch, you’ve done it wrong). TS through breath are as simple as breathing in tandem with your partner. Once you’re breathing in sync, practice breathing slow, fast, deep and shallow. Let yourself connect to e ach other BEFORE you engage in lovemaking. Get comfortable. Aligning Chakras is very easy. Stand face to face. Allow all of your Chakras to align. Verbally, say the Chakras to each other starting at the feet. Meditate at each Chakra (while still breathing in tandem).

Sit in front of each other…hold each other’s gaze (this isn’t a staring contest though). While you’re gazing, focus on how much you love your partner, what you want to do to pleasure them and vice versa. Think their name…say “I love you” in your mind…literally hold a conversation in your mind with them…you’ll know that you’re connected when you’re thinking the same thing and using complete non-verbal communication.  This is also wonderful when you’re in a crowded room and catch the gaze of your beloved…you can turn each other on without saying a word.

Once you feel connected and euphoric, you’re connected. If done right and PATIENTLY, this is true, pure FOREPLAY…

Level The Playing Field

First off, despite what people may say or be in denial about, dating is indeed a game. And frankly, its exhausting. You must really have patience, a game plan and play on a level field. One thing that I’ve learned while being single, yet dating for 5 years is that you must date someone that is at least your equal.

If you have a degree, so should he. If you have your own place, so should he. If you have your own car, so should he. If you have a child(ren), so should he. I say this, because if one player lacks anything that the other player has, it will be used against you. I’ve learned this from experience. Some people may say that they are willing to date someone that isn’t their equal in the hopes that that person will reach their level or won’t be insecure about what they aren’t equal to each other. It never works.

The main issues that I’ve faced in the dating game are men that don’t have a degree and have children. They may say that they want an educated woman, but if they are older than me, as soon as they get mad, they throw the fact that I am college educated and cultured in my face, even though I never talk about my education and college experience (which is a disservice to myself and all that I’ve accomplished). If I say something they don’t like, I have to hear: “so you think you’re so smart because you have a degree”. Or if he leaves a swallow of juice in the bottle and I complain that its ignorant, I have to hear: “Oh, so because I didn’t go to college I’m ignorant?!”. No ninja, you’re ignorant because you left less than an ounce of juice in a 64 ounce bottle…Ladies, you should NEVER settle. You should be proud of what you’ve worked hard for, especially if you are a Black woman. There are so few of us with higher education, and fewer of us in professions where we are respected and compensated according to our worth. If you meet a man that discourages you or takes “pot shots” at you when he gets mad, and tries to make you feel like you aren’t worthy of what you’ve worked hard for, LET IT GO. It won’t get better. Never should you have to hide the fact that you are educated, professional, intelligent, intellectual and driven.

As far as children go, some women without children don’t mind dating a man with children, for various reasons. Personally, I don’t want to date a man with children, because I don’t have any. I’m in the place in my life where I’m done dating to just have fun. Marriage is the next phase in my dating life. With that being said because I’m not a virgin, the only gift of my body that I can give my future husband is that I’ve never conceived a child. Also, I want to be free to date and be in a relationship without restrictions on freedom. Children require a lot of time, and they must ALWAYS be a priority. I’ll be honest…I’m not willing to come last…*shrugs*

I understand that times are hard and many people are living with family members. As long as one is contributing to the household, it is understandable. However, dating someone that doesn’t have their own space and you do gets OLD, QUICK!!! Over time, I started to feel smothered, because that person always wanted to come to my place. I couldn’t go to their place, because there was a house full of people. I’m sorry, but I want and need the freedom to be loud and bedrock if I want to. I want and need to be able to just chill without interruptions and having to leave before morning. (What the hell was I thinking?! Lol) Yet again, level the playing field.

If you have your own car, so should they…NO man will EVER drive my car unless we’re married. I understand that people have car issues, things go wrong, but always having to pick someone else up for dates is not cool…level the playing field, people.

Playing on a level field is essential in the dating game if one is serious about dating someone that they would potentially want to marry. Partnership and equality creates a strong foundation for a healthy friendship that will evolve into a relationship and then into a marriage.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Sweet as a Peach...

Ok, so most people are too shy and/or embarassed to talk about sex, especially oral sex...why, I still don't understand, but we ARE grown, so why not?

My friends suggested that I blog about this topic because we all talk about it...often. #dontjudgeus #takenotes

If you are in a relationship, have a cutty buddy, or whatever it is that you call you and whomever you are sexually active with, truly enjoying the experience truly begins with YOU! We are what we eat...with that being said, the main part of enjoying sex, especially oral sex, begins with your scent, which are linked to your taste buds...

If you eat high-acidic foods, dairy, red meat, caffeine, smoke and drink low-quality alcohol, you will smell and taste like a sour patch kid...Yes, sexual activity is usually very spontaneous, but if you have sex regularly (hopefully with one partner), it is favorable and considerate to change your food and beverage intake to appeal to your partner.

Drinking water, 100% fruit juice, whole grains, lean meats and eating fruit and non-acidic vegetables (green beans, peas, carrots) will indeed make your bodily scent and flavor sweet ANNND improve your skin complexion and hair texture. Below are tips/nutritional suggestions to help cleanse and maintain your TEMPLE!

*Eat fruit, preferably Papaya, Mango, Pineapple and Peaches. These fruits are low in acidity and are actually very good for your digestion as well.

*Drink WATER and cut out the soda! The phosphoric acid in soda wrecks your stomach, skin and brain...try sparkling water infused with fruit essence.

*If you consume alcohol, try higher quality varieties. Alcohol that is crafted by natural fermentation processes have lower acidity contents...Sake, Rolling River Beer and most vodkas fit in this category.

*STOP eating so much red meat. It is hard to digest and makes your breath smell horrible, no matter what you do...its cooked protein and blood...what do you expect?

*Dairy has high bacterial properties, so naturally, it provides you with a bitter taste. Dairy products are essential to calcium consumption, so eat/drink in moderation.

*Cinnamon, yes cinnamon is an awesome spice. It lowers blood glucose levels, boosts metabolism, and serves as a body cleanse. Drink it in hot water with fresh apples, make iced cinnamon tea or add it in your cereal...ever wonder where the reference to p*ssy being like apple pie came from? Well, there you go...

Aside from sex, maintaining your body is important to a healthy lifestyle...try these few tips and watch your energy level increase, skin and hair texture and appearance improve and body fluids taste Sweet as a Peach...

Don't believe me? Try it and get back to me!